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ISBN 978-0-316-57213-2
E3-20230828-JV-NF-ORI
To my goddesses,
Lynne Corbett, Aine Kiely and Jill Prewett,
Juno, Ceres and Astarte
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When, like a running grave, time tracks you down…
Dylan Thomas
When, Like a Running Grave
It took a long time for things to go so far. It came about because things that should have been stopped were not stopped soon enough.
The I Ching or Book of Changes
PROLOGUE
All individuals are not equally fitted to consult the oracle. It requires a clear and tranquil mind, receptive to the cosmic influences hidden in the humble divining stalks.
Richard Wilhelm
Introduction to The I Ching or Book of Changes
Letters between Sir Colin and Lady Edensor and their son William
13 March 2012
Will,
We were appalled to learn from your personal tutor yesterday that you’ve dropped out of university and joined some kind of religious movement. We’re even more astounded that you didn’t discuss this with us, or bother to tell us where you were going.
Unless we’re being lied to by the woman who answers the phone at the headquarters of the Universal Humanitarian Church, handwritten letters are the only means of contacting members. She gave me her word that this letter would be passed to you.
Your mother and I don’t understand why you’ve done this, why you didn’t talk to us first, or what can have persuaded you to abandon your course and your friends. We’re extremely worried about you.
Please get in touch IMMEDIATELY you receive this.
Dad
16 April 2012
Darling Will,
The lady at the church headquarters says you’ve received Dad’s letter, but we still haven’t heard from you, so we’re still very worried.
We think you might be at Chapman’s Farm in Norfolk. Dad and I will be at the New Inn, Roughton, this Saturday at 1 p.m. Please, Will, come and meet us, so we can talk everything over. Dad’s been doing a bit of research on the Universal Humanitarian Church and it sounds like a very interesting organisation with worthy aims. We can certainly see why it would appeal to you.
We aren’t trying to run your life, Will, we really do just want to see you and know that you’re all right.
With lots of love,
Mum xxx
29 April 2012
Dear Will,
Yesterday, I visited the UHC’s Central Temple in London and spoke to a woman who insisted that our previous letters have been passed on to you. However, as you didn’t come and meet us on Saturday or send us any word, we have no means of knowing whether she’s telling the truth.
I therefore feel it is necessary to state, for your benefit or for the benefit of whoever might be illegally opening your mail, that I know for a fact that you’re at Chapman Farm, that you never leave it unaccompanied and that you’ve lost a substantial amount of weight. I also know that it’s impossible for anyone except members of the church to visit the farm.
You’re a highly intelligent individual, Will, but the fact remains that you’re autistic and this isn’t the first time you’ve been manipulated. Unless I hear back from you by phone, or in a letter written in your own handwriting, by the 5th, I will contact the police.
I’ve been in touch with an ex-member of the Universal Humanitarian Church whom I’d like you to meet. If the church has nothing to hide and you’re remaining at Chapman Farm of your own free will, they can have no objection to you meeting us, or speaking to this individual.
Will, I repeat, unless I hear from you by the 5th of May, I will contact the police.
Dad
1 May 2012
Dear Colin and Sally,
Thank you for your letters. Everything is fine. I am very happy in the UHC and I now understand many things that I never understood before. In fact, I am not ‘on the spectrum’. That’s a label you’ve attached to me to justify the levels of control you’ve exerted on me all my life. I’m not your flesh object and, unlike you, I’m not motivated by money or materialist considerations.
I understand from your last letter that you’ve been having Chapman Farm watched. I’m an adult and the fact that you continue to treat me as an infant who should be spied on just proves how little I can trust you.
I also know exactly which ‘ex-member’ of the UHC you want me to meet. He’s a very dangerous, malicious man who’s done harm to many innocent people. I advise you to have no more contact with him.
The Drowned Prophet Will Bless All Who Worship Her.
Will
2 May 2012
Darling Will,
We were so happy to get a letter from you, but we’re a little bit concerned by it, because it really doesn’t sound like you, darling.
Will, please meet us. If we can meet you face-to-face, we’ll be reassured that you’re happy and know what you’re doing. That’s all we ask, a face-to-face meeting.
Darling, I want to be completely honest with you. Dad did have somebody watching Chapman Farm because he was so worried about you, but I promise that’s all finished. Dad’s cancelled the arrangement. Nobody’s spying on you and we don’t want to control you, Will. We only want to see you and hear from your own lips that you’re happy and that you’re acting of your own free will.
We love you, and I promise we only want the best for you.
Mum xxx
12 May 2012
Dear Colin and Sally,
I will meet you at the Central Temple in Rupert Court, London, on 23rd May at midday. Do not bring anyone with you, especially any ex-member of the church, because they won’t be admitted.
The Drowned Prophet Will Bless All Who Worship Her.
Will
24 May 2012
Dear Colin and Sally,
I agreed to meet you yesterday to prove I’m completely happy and fully in control of my own choices. Both of you demonstrated high levels of egomotivity and were disrespectful to me and abusive towards people I esteem and love.
If you contact the police or start having me watched again I will bring charges against you in court. The Church has arranged for me to be assessed by a doctor who will testify that I have full capacity and that you are the ones trying to exert undue influence on me. I have also consulted the UHC’s lawyers. My trust fund is my own and as Grandpa left me that money, not you, you have no right to prevent me from using my inheritance for good.
The Drowned Prophet Will Bless All Who Worship Her.
Will
16 March 2013
Darling Will,
I know I say it in every letter, but please, please contact us. We understand and respect the fact that you want to remain with the UHC. All we want is to know that you’re happy and well. Most of all, we’d like to see you in person. It’s been over a year, Will. We miss you so much.
I sent your birthday present to Chapman Farm. I hope you got it all right.
Please, Will, get in touch. Nobody’s going to try and persuade you to leave the UHC. All we want is your happiness. Dad deeply regrets some of the things he said when we last met. We aren’t angry, Will, we just miss you desperately.
Dad’s going to add his own note, but I just want to say that I love you with my whole heart and simply want to know that you’re OK.
Mum xxxxxx
Will,
I sincerely apologise for what I said about the church last year. I hope you can forgive me, and that you’ll get in touch. Mum misses you very much, as do I.